4-D Forgiveness

Forgiveness is something we all need! The most real, life-changing forgiveness is a gift from God. We can't earn it or create it, only accept it as a real gift (Ephesians 1:4-5, 2:1-10).

Forgiveness helps us:

• let go of the garbage of past hurts and regrets
• have courage to keep building deep and lasting friendships
• communicate better (hear the other person's heart)
• keep hoping in the promise that God will never leave us or stop loving us
• live in freedom from bitterness and others' judgments of us.

Looking back is good if it helps you keep looking up!

Here are the 4-D's pastor John and myself have shared with so many people (Using these four steps is a way of spending the time necessary to heal from the hurts of everyday life). Pray through each step. Maybe you'll want to write it all down - then burn or shred it when you're done.

1) Discover who hurt you

2) Define what they took from you (or neglected to give to you)

3) Dispose of the hurt (you don't have to wait until you feel like forgiving - forgiveness is not forgetting; it's choosing to forgive the way Jesus forgave us)

4) Demonstrate God's forgiveness by doing good to others (maybe even the person who hurt you).

If you'd like to read the Cliff Notes of Joseph in the Bible, it's a classic story of forgiveness. I've listed some key verses in the story. It all begins in Genesis 37 and takes a break in chapter 50. Chapter 37:4,23-24 (from hatred to attempted murder); 39:2 (Even in slavery Joe is blessed because "God is with him"); 42:5-8 (Joe doesn't take advantage of an opportunity to even the score with his brothers); 45:5 (An amazing perspective that comes out of forgiveness); and 50:20 (Belief that God takes evil and turns it into good).